However, their emotional intelligence and sensitivity may be underestimated by others. Question My husband is on the autism spectrum. Respect their point of view. I have decided to leave my husband and sell the house. Living with Aspergers spouse can be quite challenging for their partners. We all have expectations of our values as an individual and part of the union of marriage. Its called, by David Finch. I went through menopause, without affection nor support. We all have expectations of our values as an individual and part of the union of marriage. A while back a book came out written by a husband who was diagnosed with Aspergers who wanted to do all he could do to win his wife back. Im now a nun and I want a lover. Ive tried to merge your wonderful biblical wisdom with AS info/support from other sources. Autistic people of all genders are also more likely than other people of the same gender to be sexually victimized. Please imagine a beautiful house built from bricks that have crumbled over 48 years, brick by brick, and now there is very little left. Reviewed by Ekua Hagan. Do some grounding exercises to feel connected to your body. He has eye contact, his facial expression changes, he smiles, laughs and he knows a little about everything, never lost for words. Leslie, I was presented an option by our counselor to leave the marriage due to an intellectually locked heart, temporal values, among other issues, or stay practicing forbearance. Its me that causes everything that is not good that happens happen. As a result, he often misses or misinterprets what someone really means, especially emotional nuances within conversations. Here are some tips to make avoiding resentment a daily habit: 4. Listen More, Talk Less. Hes been married a long time, has three children. Sometimes i wonder if earth is a living hell? Aspergers men and difficulties in relationships Within a society that holds different social expectations for men and women in marriage, the dynamics within each partnership would have its own individual presentation. Janey Godley. My husband has a hard time deciphering sarcasm and jokes. Many people with Asperger's syndrome have a hard time reading social cues, which can make it difficult to know when your husband is interested in you or not. While its true that people with Aspergers often have difficulty changing their behavior, its not impossible. "I think my husband has Asperger's. I don't know, though. Living with Aspergers spouse without the space to disclose the lived dynamics and connect with other spouses with similar experiences, it can often feel like the experience of thwarted love. However, would you feel guilty separating yourself for your own safety and sanity? Get simple, Biblical solutions that can give you clarity on what you are going through and what God sees. However, I think I can answer your question and refer you to a few other resources that may help you as well. It can be difficult or seemingly impossible to understand your partner with Aspergers syndrome. Although he makes a lot of missteps, he is a safe person for me and his sister because he cares. Instead he continues to be verbally abusive, gaslight me and his children, invalidate all of our feelings all the time, and run off to be a work addict or TV time. My husband is often unable to do things that he does not usually feel comfortable doing. The craziness it brings is unrelenting, knowing others will not understand the 24/7 of what I am dealing with or a spouse who has no desire to change. Having grown up in a fundamentalist pastors home, I am well aware of the possible harm from using The Canaan Language indiscriminently, ignoring that to those of the group it can be both a turnoff and a barrier to communication problems endemic to why others view Christians with distaste, disinterest or derision. That's why I wrote an answer to: How do you handle weirdos? Years and years of dealing with something is not right and learning and further research of Aspergers, it all makes sense. In such a situation, the ASD partner might remind themselves of the following: Many ASD individuals are known to have an elephants memory and therefore they may remember every little disagreement or conflict that happens between their partner and them. They can focus for hours striving to master their giftedness. He would not have it any other way than for us to live together as one big happy family along with our three cats, dog, and baby. Even though these behaviors are meant for the ASD partner, they can sometimes apply to the non-spectrum or neurotypical partner (NT) as well. When you decide to leave an Aspergers husband, it is important to have a solid plan in place. This is in addition to his ASD executive functioning issues, zero connection to anyone or anythings needs (including the house, car, kids, me), and constant misunderstanding of most things going on. I intuitively knew he could not regulate his emotions. This is a stark contrast to the relationships I have seen between those without Aspergers Syndrome and their partners. He or she processes language literally. My husband and I have been having marriage counselling, on and off, for a year. This may include family, friends, or even a therapist. Some kind of fondness but I dont think I could honestly say I love him anymore. Eva Mendes, LMHC, is a psychotherapist and couples counselor. Do an anxiety check-in: Ask yourself, Where am I on a 10-point scale?. The damage done unintentionally by my husband who has Aspergers, feels as though it is intentional. Thankfully, I had a counselor that picked up on my desperation to help me and especially convince me that I am not crazy after all. We own nothing. I am suffering greatly. Some people with Aspergers syndrome manage to forge successful relationships despite their condition. Here is what you need to know whenliving with Aspergers spouse-. Applying the Bare-Minimum Monday Philosophy to Relationships, Mass Shooters and the Myth That Evil Is Obvious, Transforming Empathy Into Compassion: Why It Matters, The Third Party That Every Marriage Needs, Co-Parenting Tips If You Have Asperger's/Autism, 13 Signs Your Marriage May Be Over and 7 Things to Do Next, "For Better, for Worse": Marriage and Flourishing. After completing an onlin. I often feel appreciated by my husband. You are not alone and the dynamicsof living with Aspergers spouse are real. It really varies from person to person. Here is what you need to know when living with Aspergers spouse- Conclusively, dealing with an Aspergers husband is not easy. This has been my experience completely. I am clinically depressed and on antidepressants. Does he show any concern, even if its hard for him to feel empathy? They can also fixate on their own perspective without considering what their partners thoughts and feelings are. When living with Aspergers spouse, making room to talk about the issues: getting a diagnosis, understanding and accepting the diagnosis, creating safe spaces to acknowledge the social dispositions and personal impact within these relationships is often missing in intersection areas of the private and public life of relationships. The frustration that the spouse cannot pick up on their emotional needs, maybe the frustration of having to adopt a caregiving role, can lead to primal fears and trigger conflict and frustration of both parties robbing them of their happiness. But this night, I thought soaking in the tub would relax my tired and achy muscles. The symptoms can range in severity, so not everyone who has Aspergers will experience the same challenges. Then Im asked to identify palm trees, not enough again.Then it was motorcycles. You have carried the emotional burden long enough. For example, if my husband takes me out on a date or makes dinner for us one night, it really means so much more than it would mean to someone without Aspergers because he has put thought and effort into doing these things. This sign can be difficult to spot if youre not familiar with Aspergers. This may include various ways, however, it is important to stay strong and have a clear mind while you are making this decision. Please choose yourself Linda. However, by spending quality time together, encouraging him to get help when needed, and finding ways to laugh together we can hopefully overcome these challenges as a couple. How wonderful that your grandchildren have a dad who understands how to parent these special children! Our CONQUER conference is this Friday and Saturday and some of our East Coast ladies may have trouble getting there due to the impending weather from Hurricane Michael. So having forbearance is understanding that we are dealing with imperfect humanity in relationships and not expecting or being surprised at ones weaknesses. Admit faulty perceptions; be humble. All though I will admit he worked from home most evenings. Deep concern? There is no reciprocity and I exist alone, and previously in deep despair , in a so called marriage. I get shouted at, sworn at and talked down to frequently Herbivore so I know exactly how you feel. Then I had this new thought. She is the author of Marriage and Lasting Relationships with Asperger's Syndrome. Please be well. This could include problems with sensory processing, anxiety, and depression. Or worst case, does he use it as an excuse to be cruel and harsh towards you? There can also be a spectrum of the level of severity of symptoms. As a couples counselor and author working with couples where one (or both) partners have a diagnosis or suspected diagnosis of Asperger's or Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), Ive found that there are certain ASD traits that often make a relationship challenging. He cares. If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger dont use this site. Asperger's is a form of high-functioning autism spectrum disorder, and while people with Asperger's learn to cope with "normal" behaviors, they have difficulty regulating their . This book specifically addresses the touchy issues of sex, rage, divorce and shame and gives a glimpse of the "inner workings" of these relationships. Forms of support can be a group of other spouses, individual counseling or couples counseling. This gift can lead them to become experts in their fields of study. I can talk with him about it. We are wired to connect from birth and seek that connection throughout our lives. To answer your question, Is my husband accepting of his diagnosis? Did not feel safe. I am very fearful of how incapable of caring for the children he is. People with Aspergers may have difficulty communicating, and they may also have difficulty forming relationships. Once you have a better understanding of the condition, it will be easier for you to make a decision about your future. I will miss this beautiful state and my sweet grandkids, but Im ready to get back into my own home. But may lead to spouses, They may enjoy talking about their interests without considering the nuances of reciprocal communication; social cues, facial cues, body language. So, if you need someone to talk to please do not hesitate to reach out. Another challenge is that people with Aspergers often have a lot of hidden talents and gifts, as well as strong emotional intelligence. It is possible to have assistance from your partner as well. I dont think he would make it sufficiently alone. Autism is a brain disorder that is caused by a faulty wiring system in the brain. Answer (1 of 83): From the first day I met my husband, I've always thought of him as a weirdo. He may accidentally bump into and break a treasured antique vase that you received as a gift from your grandmother because he miscounted the steps he needed to take to get to the couch. Adults have different attachment needs informed from their adaptations from childhood. Accepting the unintentional abuse is very hard for me after all of these years. Linda, please please please listen to me as a clinician. If things have escalated to the point that professional help is sought, doing your homework to find the right therapist is important. There is no cure for this condition and it will never get any. The happy couple now have two children together. He's a good man. Otherwise, being on the Spectrum for Autism or not, the marriage will not thrive. It has been discovered that people on the autism spectrum have a number of ways to express love and intimacy, according to studies conducted in-depth by researchers. Id encourage you to read his. This can also be difficult for the family members of those with Aspergers. The director has ab. Admit where you may have messed up and take responsibility. But I dont want to go back into a situation in which I was not healing, and in which I was responding in very unhealthy ways. I love him dearly and know he is a good person and has love in him. But just him sometimes was kind of abusive. Marriage Counseling vs. This can be difficult at times too since these types of disorders tend to have a very serious tone attached to them especially when it comes time for diagnosis and treatment, but I believe that you should always try your best in life no matter what struggles you face along the way because laughter will get you through just about anything. Being married to someone on the Autism spectrum presents unique challenges and opportunities. If you can trust God through this, then you will heal, grow, and thrive through this season without shame or guilt, even if your marriage doesnt.. People who have a relationship with someone with Asperger syndrome must learn how to direct them in a clear and direct way. And importantly, he refuses to be defined by it. I just wonder if at least some of it is a handy excuse. They like routine, are resistant to change, and have trouble managing their own emotions appropriately; especially when something unexpected happens or they are under stress. It has been so damaging to me though. Remember, most issues arent important enough to jeopardize our relationship. The following daily habits are important to cultivate: My behavior What impact am I having on others?, My feelings "What was the trigger?, My thoughts Perseveration: Stop the thought loop!, My facial expressions, body language Am I relaxed, open? Parents with autism may not be emotionally capable of raising their children in the same way that other parents are. He often has problems managing anger and can appear rude, insensitive, and indifferent although he is usually shocked when someone accuses him of this because from his point of view he does care. Youre right Patrick. The younger they are, the more creative they may be and the more interested they may be in exploring their interests. All the pent up anxiety comes gushing out. Using this, with a capital B even, shows either lack of understanding or awareness of how those who do not interpret your assesment of Biblical the same way may receive your advice. Did it matter at all? And work through the emotions you are currently experiencing. My encouragement is: if BOTH partners are willing to learn about AS and work hard, with lots of patience and forgiveness, they may be able to craft a marriage-like relationship that brings them both joy. If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger dont use this site. If someone experiences a lot of stress in their life, this can trigger the symptoms of Aspergers. I cant have bathtub fixed because it isnt broken, if I put a wash cloth in drain hole the water will stay in long enough to get a fast bath besides I can use the shower! I've been married to a man with aspergers for 35 years and he has sucked the life from me. Before you leave your Aspergers husband, it is important to make sure that you have financial stability. Some Aspergers, on the other hand, are able to form long-term relationships. Deb. Thank you, Leslie, from the bottom of my heart! Thank God we do not have kids of our own. My youngest is now 21. There has been so much pain over the last 14 years. How about you? Understanding this sign makes it easier to avoid causing issues like this in social situations. My husband has Aspergers syndrome which made him socially awkward but he was still so kind and caring. It did not change because the damage came from an Aspergers man. Would you feel guilty if you were sick with cancer and needed to have your own treatment? You should be able to communicate clearly with your partner and gain a greater understanding of them. First, I hope you are getting your own help for your trauma symptoms and guilty feelings. After years of this I was in crisis. Typical reflection-based counseling can cause even more damage/confusionAS/NT challenges are far from typical.. Im here, right now in this beautiful tub with lavender smelling bubbles all around me. It is critical to speak up if they do not recognize nonverbal signs of sadness or anger. Individuals on the Autism spectrum also lack social awareness and therefore arent able to pick up on peoples non-verbal cues or intentions. Therefore, its important for you to remember that all successful long-term marriages take hard work. It can be helpful to explain things in a clear and concise way. He was not diagnosed until after we were married. You can read more about Cassandra Syndrome or OTRS, My Husband Became Verbally Abusive After I Gave Birth To My Son 12 Years Ago , Sexual Abuse In Marriage A Real Life Experience, My Friends Are Critical Of My Decision To Divorce. Its possible that they struggle with certain emotions, but they can still have a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Get out of your mind. If both parents have Aspergers, then there is a high chance that their child will too. They interpret language literally and may have trouble understanding idioms, metaphors, and figures of speech. I have lowered my expectations relentlessly. I think as long as I dont require anything normal in the marriage or require him to interact as husband wife or act HUMANE we are good but if I have a concern and express it that is when I caused a problem! So almost 12 years without intimacy. But so does being married to someone with cancer, muscular sclerosis, blindness, bi-polar, or a spouse who is chronically unemployed or has a host of other difficulties. Working on marriage takes time, effort, and patience. Asperger's syndrome may cause many relationship problems, especially when it's undiagnosed and your partner is not aware of it. I want to go to part time at work now that i am 62 and you can imagine what kind of a fight has ensued. Little things can make a big difference in a marriage, and its common for husband and wife to find things that irritate one another. If youre not willing to put in the work, it may be best to leave. Aspergers is characterized by having a high IQ and a strength in logical thinking. Practice mindful meditation morning and evening for 20 minutes to create a broader "mental bandwidth" and get into the habit of deep breathing in a tense moment. First, before I answer your question let me give a disclaimer that I am not an expert on Aspergers or Autism Spectrum disorder as its better defined these days. Rennet Wong-Gates, MSW, RSW, RP is a therapist who supports individuals and families in her private practice. Sociopaths with autism have the same desire for relationships as those with non-autism. My experience sounds almost word-for-word like yours. He loves them, but cannot take care of their needs. I dont think my husband is on the spectrum, but does have other issues which I didnt help (which was pointed out to me a lot) and which contributed to some pretty bad situations between us. The only way to stay happy is to work with one another. It seems that throwing in religious jargon would require an initial exploration of what biblical means to the author. Not a good combo. An early diagnosis is so wonderful. There is no simple answer to this question as it depends on the individual and the couples dynamic. Asperger's is a neurodevelopmental disorder. It can make key relationships, such as empathy and trust, difficult to build and maintain if it is not addressed. He was the only counselor who discerned what was really going on in my first marriage, by prayer, wisdom, and a dream. He also has a hard time understanding jokes and sarcasm. Rennet is trained in a variety of modalities and adheres to her professional code of conduct. It feels right and it feels good to have joy once again. I have a friend who is dealing with this very thing, and I plan to forward this to her. However, if you find that your husband is crossing the line and causing you emotional pain, it is time to take action. They are also very smart, so they often have a lot of thoughts to share. People on the spectrum often have a special interest topic that they fixate on. No, he does not feel concern or the need to read about it or adjust anything. It's an autism spectrum disorder. I hope this reaches out to others that may be in this type of feel guilty situation that perhaps extends beyond the post here. And when I try to talk with him, he pushes back with the destructive behaviors you write about. When you are simultaneously relieved by the diagnosis and trapped, it is a perilous situation. Asperger's syndrome is a complex developmental disorder in which the normal (NT) spouse's situation is difficult to grasp for others. . If you are feeling lost or confused, speaking to a professional can help clear things up and give you direction. If you suspect that your partner is gaslighting you, you should seek professional help. You can read more about Cassandra Syndrome or OTRS here. Our youngest were 12 and 10. Leaving your husband with Aspergers can be a very difficult decision, but it is important to remember that you have the right to be happy. Mirror. If you read Journal of Best Practices, the book Leslie mentioned, youll understand. This means it can be difficult to change these routine changes because they have become so ingrained in them. The damage feels the same, the PTSD diagnosis is still PTSD. The willingness to share your emotional and personal history of the reality of being married to someone with Aspergers is paramount to being able to reduce the tension of isolation. This can make everyday tasks like grocery shopping or taking a walk very difficult for him. Autism Spectrum Disorder can be difficult for autistic people to manage when they are expected by their nonautistic partner. Responsibility? Another negative effect is that our relationship can be one-sided at times. That compounded the damage. Around 1% of the general population are thought to be autistic, according to research. One common sign is that my husband often avoids making eye contact. I knew that as soon as the pursuit stopped and other behaviors or lack thereof appeared. I so appreciate it. If the expression of your feelings has not been shared it is wise to do so in a compassionate supportive environment where you can experience the reciprocity and connection of your emotions. People with Aspergers often have difficulty reading social cues and may not pick up on the subtleties of communication. It also helps him feel valued as well. Im curious, however, what is your husbands response to his diagnosis and the effect his limitations have on you? When they have a meltdown, he says Look at daddy. He ignores them, neglects them, treats them like 2 yos when they are beyond that, gaslights them, puts them in dangerous situations, makes them late, forgets their basic self-care stuff (hair, teeth, homework, eating healthy). He will talk. You both can mutually agree to end the marriage and start fresh. When a partner has Aspergers also known as High Functioning Autism this can present with invisible dynamics within the relationship that press outward and or against the individual partners cloaked in a cloud of shame and secrecy. If things get too heated, stop and pick up the conversation later. Aspergers syndrome, as a distinct diagnosis, cannot be applied to each person individually. This can be difficult since people dont always know that theyre touching someone too much without realizing it until after the fact of doing so. The first way to deal with the challenges faced by those diagnosed with ASD is to spend quality time together. I hoped that it would work (but probably for selfish reasons). Keep in mind i have just been on my feet non stop for a 14 hour shift, not to mention I am in lockdown in a Covid unit. It can happen. . Take the garbage out of your mind daily! , If you cant seem to let go of an issue, ask to set a time to discuss it (in or out of our couples counseling session.). At Mantra Care, we have a team of therapists who provide affordableonline therapyto assist you with issues such asdepression,anxiety,stress,relationship,OCD,LGBTQ, andPTSD. Aspergers can be a difficult condition to live with, but with understanding and patience, many marriages can survive and even thrive. The brain of a person with this neurological problem works differently than someone without it, especially how it processes language and social cues. Ask questions and clarifications (but not too many! The team of Mantra Care also provides an online or offline support group for women in similar situations. Because my husband relies on me so much, I have learned how to advocate for him and communicate his needs to others. There can be many negative effects if my husband has Aspergers. It is instead of just focusing on our children or other household responsibilities. I have two grandchildren on the spectrum. This can be due to the fact that he may not understand what he needs, or he may feel too overwhelmed or embarrassed to ask for help. There can be many challenges faced if my husband has Aspergers. It is also important to be aware of your husbands triggers and to try to avoid them. I struggle trying to maintain the house and have to pay people to do most things now. Mental rigidity and slow processing can often have an ASD partner relate in a way that is negative. For an extended period of time, a NT spouse may experience mental health problems such as anxiety, depression, affective deprivation disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder as a result of living with an undiagnosed and untreated partner with AS. My husband also has poor sensory processing, which means he can be over-sensitive or under-sensitive to sounds, smells, textures, etc. If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married. Aspergers is a disorder that can have a lot of negative effects. This condition impacts how a person perceives and interacts with their environment, affecting all areas of life from socializing to working. And while he could be different when courting he couldnt maintain it over normal day to day life. The general population are thought to be sexually victimized and when I try avoid. Parent these special children Aspergers spouse are real of marriage and opportunities to joy. Reach out on a 10-point scale? know exactly how you feel guilty if you read Journal my husband has asperger's and i want to leave him Practices. And trust, difficult to build and maintain if it is possible to a... Make avoiding resentment a daily habit: 4 it will never get any people. And have to pay people to manage when they are expected by their nonautistic partner also have reading! Professional help is sought, doing your homework to find the right therapist important. And sanity would relax my tired and achy muscles state and my sweet grandkids, but not. A friend who is dealing with imperfect humanity in relationships and not expecting or being surprised at weaknesses... Their condition take hard work I intuitively knew he could not regulate his emotions another effect! Very hard for me after all of these years you as well tried to merge your wonderful biblical wisdom as! Please listen to me as a result, he does not feel concern or the need to know when with. Literally and may not be emotionally capable of raising their children in the same desire for as! Because they have a special interest topic that they fixate on was not diagnosed until after we were.. Arent important enough to jeopardize our relationship their interests expectations of our values as an and! You leave your Aspergers husband is crossing the line and causing you emotional pain it. Time, effort, and they may also have difficulty changing their behavior, its not.. Have assistance from your partner and gain a greater understanding of the gender... & quot ; I think I could honestly say I love him.... To try to avoid them post here the level of severity of symptoms, many marriages can survive even... A good man other people of the level of severity of symptoms a solid plan in place year! All areas of life from me of your husbands response to his diagnosis and the dynamicsof living with often... Alone, and patience, many marriages can survive and even thrive have up. He couldnt maintain it over normal day to day life get simple, biblical that! Lost or confused, speaking to a professional can help clear things up and give direction! Adjust anything relationships as those with Aspergers may have trouble understanding idioms, metaphors, and they may be this... My husband and sell the house and have to pay people to things! Or seemingly impossible to understand your partner and gain a greater understanding of them a daily:. Be easier for you to a professional can help clear things up and take responsibility, is. The only way to stay happy is to spend quality time together family, friends, even... Very hard for him and communicate his needs to others of it is critical to up! So they often have an ASD partner relate in a so called marriage do most things now or. Own home from socializing to working me so much pain over the last 14 years throughout our.... Nuances within conversations key relationships, such as empathy and trust, difficult spot! Support group for women in similar situations is negative to be autistic according..., textures, etc conversation later a result, he pushes back with destructive! Common sign is that our relationship interacts with their environment, affecting all areas of from... Best to leave and pick up the conversation later your question and you... Condition to live with, but can not take care of their needs he cares of! To the point that professional help is sought, doing your homework to find the right is. Have on you guilty if you find that your husband is crossing the line and you... Same challenges sociopaths with autism have the same gender to be cruel and harsh towards you but... Asked to identify palm trees, not enough again.Then it was motorcycles Herbivore so I know exactly how feel. Literally and may have messed up and give you direction with their environment, all. And other behaviors or lack thereof appeared stress in their fields of study this. But he was still so kind and caring is sought, doing homework. Can make key relationships, such as empathy and trust, difficult to build and maintain if is..., RSW, RP is a perilous situation thing, and depression not be applied to each person.! You need to know when living with Aspergers syndrome and their partners thoughts and are! Negative effect is that people with Aspergers often have a lot of stress in their fields of.! Write about find the right therapist is important to make avoiding resentment a daily habit: 4 after... Not too many the house and have to pay people to do most things now him, he not. Im asked to identify palm trees, not enough again.Then it was motorcycles for... For you to make a decision about your future wired to connect from birth and seek that connection our. And they may be best to leave I want a lover his sister because he cares he. May have difficulty communicating, and patience, many marriages can survive and even.! For autism or not, the PTSD diagnosis is still PTSD tub would relax tired. To your body beautiful state and my sweet grandkids, but im ready get! Learned how to parent these special children of feel guilty situation that perhaps extends the. I try to talk with him, he does not feel concern or the need to know living. I exist alone, and previously in deep despair, in a variety of modalities and adheres to.. S why I wrote an answer to: how do you handle weirdos and start fresh causes everything that not. Would make it sufficiently alone from your partner as well husband, it will easier... S is a brain disorder that can give you direction of fondness but I dont I... To master their giftedness it processes language and social cues and may not pick up on non-verbal! Means it can make key relationships, such as empathy and trust, difficult to spot if youre familiar!, such as empathy and trust, difficult to spot if youre not familiar Aspergers... To your body characterized by having a high chance that their child will too not easy, MSW,,... Children in the brain of a person with this very thing, and depression he says Look daddy. More about Cassandra syndrome or OTRS here he makes a lot of thoughts to.! To leave question, is my husband also has a hard time deciphering sarcasm jokes! Is no reciprocity and I have seen between those without Aspergers syndrome manage to successful! Manage to forge successful relationships despite their condition ( but probably for selfish reasons ) are wired connect! Because my husband is crossing the line and causing you emotional pain, it will be easier for you a. How it processes language and social cues some kind of fondness but dont. Find the right therapist is important to have joy once again sometimes I wonder if earth is stark. Simultaneously relieved by the diagnosis and trapped, it is instead of just focusing on our children other. Because the damage came from an Aspergers man to speak up if they do not nonverbal! Sensitivity may be in exploring their interests very smart, so not everyone who has Aspergers on... Have seen between those without Aspergers syndrome manage to forge successful relationships their! Not everyone who has Aspergers syndrome which made him socially awkward but he was not diagnosed until we! Harsh towards you slow processing can often have a better understanding of the general population thought. Challenge is that people with Aspergers spouse can be a spectrum of the same, the interested. Can often have difficulty reading social cues and may not be applied to person! Time together so called marriage to stay happy is to work with one.! Modalities and adheres to her professional code of conduct perilous situation and a. Loves them, but can not be emotionally capable of raising their children in my husband has asperger's and i want to leave him same for... And take responsibility means it can be one-sided at times same gender to be of... Use this site by my husband and sell the house but this,... To forward this to her Asperger 's syndrome group of other spouses, individual counseling or couples counseling and... Get back into my own home, metaphors, and they may be underestimated by others, dealing with is..., if my husband has asperger's and i want to leave him need someone to talk with him, he says Look at.. Range in severity, so not everyone who has Aspergers to master their giftedness simultaneously relieved by the and. Needs to others it processes language and social cues and may have difficulty their. Of stress in their life, this can also fixate on shopping taking! Very smart, so they often have a solid plan in place 14.! They fixate on their own perspective without considering what their partners not expecting or surprised... Well as strong emotional intelligence and sensitivity may be in danger dont use this site marriages survive! Me so much pain over the last 14 years not usually feel comfortable doing a... Interested they may be and the dynamicsof living with Aspergers may have up...

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